Today at 1pm... send shangjuan to the airport... she's going to shenzhen to find qingfeng.... so sweet rite? envy her leh... cos the first person she thot of is her bf... n she's going over to find him... *ENVY* Today on my way back from airport... i was thinking... from the past relationship till now... i realised tis change in me... in the past, i m always the da nu ren in the picture... i m always a demanding girl.... i expect a lot from my bf... little bit i oso wont give in... i think tis is the past me... haizz... dunno y i m like tat... since young... i always have no confident in relationship... in my mind concept... i always feel tat marriage life is not a secured life... marriage can divorce oso... i always feel tat i must be able to lead a independent life... i promise to study hard n be independent to live myself in future... suddenly everything on me changes... dunno since when... think when i grow older... my mind concept all changes... i have become a xiao nu ren... just wan a good bf n live happily... but m i creating troubles for myself? i oso dunno... maybe everything is just fated... i have no more strength left to think of anything... i think the more i think the more stress i will become... so i decided to leave everything natually n leave it to fate... i realised tis term is really meaningful... shi ni de, ming li yi ding hui shi ni de... bu shi ni de, wu lun zhe mo qiang qiu ye shi yi yang de jie guo... so wat does it mean? everything is fated! in ur life... who ends up wif u in the end is fated oso... who meet who... who got to know who... who will end up wif u... who will be the one u love... who u will wan to spend ur life wif... all are fated! ppl a;ways say will u end up wif the man or woman u love most in tis world... actually i have the ans oso... cos normally u wont end up wif the man or woman u lost most... but which is the one u prefer? if u marry a guy, does it mean he is not the guy tat u love most? or if u love a person very much now, does it mean tat u wont end up wif him? all are contradicting parts n parcels of life... so conclusion in life... just lead a normal n simple life... Life is just a boring n meaningless route to go... the only way is to fill ur life wif colours... but in order to fill ur life wif colours... wat we need to do? there's a lot need to be done... perhaps tis is a difficult period for me... but everybody needs to go thru all tis to grow up... perhaps, i can say... i m starting to grow up now... i have become a gal who wan to see future... i dun wan a meaningless life... but i do believe how beautiful or how colourful my life is going to be... is all created by me... (",)